As I sit here,
holding back the tears.
I realize something.
I’ve been a burden to them.
I’m being a burden to them;
the one person I don’t want to.
I’m crying over something irrelevant.
They can’t help it;
neither can I.
So, Why am I crying?
This happens every week;
I can’t see this person
after nightmares that I fear;
they make me afraid for this;
this thing to ever end.
They haven’t done wrong;
everything’s gone well;
I just am fearful to lose it;
to lose this thing I’ve built.
I love them.
But, here I am trying not to cry;
just because of the time.
It’s only been a week;
I feel pathetic.
I should be glad
not feeling sad;
I have more than most
with this person I love.
What’s my problem?
These nightmares aren’t terrible;
I should have adjusted.
I know it won’t happen;
they would never do that.
But, I’m afraid.
Does anyone agree?
This is pathetic?
It’s my problem;
not theirs to fix.
That’s how I feelings though,
I don’t know how to pause them.
Wow. You pulled me right in, and I can see the pain and confusion. Hang in there!
Thank you Ilana.
I am a Christian, and I hope you don’t mind me saying that I’ll pray for you.
I don’t mind it at all. Thank you friend.